Lessons in Friendships

At home we often play the game This or That.  If you’ve never played it’s a word game where someone gives you two options, and you have to say which you prefer.  It can be very enlightening as you find out what people think and their current interests and likes.  As one of the kids celebrated a birthday this week, we ended playing an age based version; 10 or 30? 5 or 6? 5 or 100?

At one point my daughter groaned and said “Mummy, you always pick the youngest option!”  To be fair when the options are 5 or 100, I think that’s quite reasonable, but there are certain aspects of being a child I wouldn’t want to go through again.

This week, like many weeks before, we’ve had multiple discussions with our kids about how to be a good friend.  This weeks lessons have included “How to say No nicely,” “When to tell and when not to tell,” “The power of forgiveness,” “Your actions speak louder than words,” and I’m sure there have been many more along the way.

We want our children to learn how to get along with others and be part of a team; and yet be confident to go it alone when needed.  We want them to stand up against injustice; and yet understand when to choose to let things go without a complaint. We want them to take responsibility and understand how their actions have affected others; and yet realise that sometimes there’s nothing they could have done.

Oh the joys of childhood friendships!  I’m so thankful I’ve moved on from that stage and for the friends that I now have in my life.

“She opens her mouth with wisdom and on her tongue is the law of kindness” Proverbs 31:26

As I faced the challenges of the week I’ve had a variety of friends cheering me on and speaking words of wisdom and encouragement to me.  Hopefully, somewhere along the way, I was able to do that for them too.  I refuse to allow my own insecurities to motivate me to knock others down.  Instead I want to be known as a woman who uses her words to build others up and is the biggest cheerleader any friend could wish for!

In fact if I could teach my children just one thing about friendships it would be this; leave others feeling taller because they’ve spent time with you.

Just imagine a world where we all did that!


3 thoughts on “Lessons in Friendships

  1. You’re right it is hard teaching children about friendship. Children automatically think it’s all about them, but when they just show that little bit of empathy or kindness or caring nature you inwardly smile. My friend needed to vent anger and frustration, I listened. On the way home from school we passed and she thanked me, Jack asked “mum what did you do?” I said “I listened.” ” you just listened.” Said Jack with a confused face yes Jack being there for someone is a sign of being a friend. I do hope it registered with him! Let’s wait and see. Xx

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